Home Sick

I have been in Hong Kong for two and a half weeks now and am still looking for a job. There are plenty of jobs available but it seems like nothing is what I want to do. Maybe I have too high of an expectations... Sometimes I regret that I did not work hard enough at school... maybe I should've concentrated on school instead of work... I am not sure if any company is even interested or value my work experience.

I still don't have a place to live and I miss having a place to call my own. It's really difficult to live out of a drawer.  I surprised myself that I cried so hard because I was home sick; it never once occurred to me that I would be so upset about leaving home. I've always thought that Hong Kong was my home... but maybe I didn't realize that all these years Vancouver has already became my home.

The people in Hong Kong is a little difficult to get used to... many are really rude and impolite...sigh.... 

I can't believe that as a university graduate, I can't even afford a 100 sq ft. of living space.... I saw this demonstration flat in Ikea yesterday,  the flat was 346 sq. ft. and I LOVED the space! I would love to be able to live in a space like that... it was so cozy! I hope I will be able to have a place to call my own soon.

Sometimes I feel that my boyfriend wouldn't understand me because he has nothing much to worry about in his life. He has a nice home, school term waiting ahead... everything going for him. Why would he want to leave his cozy life and live with me... I know he's always trying to comfort me... a few years may fly by for him... but to me these 2.5 weeks feels like half a year. I am not sure if he understands the pain that I am going through..... the effort that he will spend "waiting" to marry me in the next few years will not be the same as the effort that I will need to put out.

I just don't know what to do...maybe I should just pack it up and go home...